Older persons of Sri Lanka: a caring son's view on his elderly father

by Ajith
29-Sep-2017

By Rajendra Sathyajith Wijesinghe

Content would be lengthy. But I invite all of you to go through which I feel either neglected, unattended or remain unanswered in refer to the aged, where I tried to find answers through my father. 

Loneliness
As to him, he has suffered major losses; demise of my mother around three decades ago and my parting with migration to overseas. However with my return, he seems to enjoy my stay with him above the physical facilitation. The loss of significant relationship is difficult for elders. The elderly are especially susceptible to loneliness, as their long-term care environments can often remind them of their own mortality. I observed through him the physical relocation, where the places and people are unfamiliar is difficult to bear up. Unfamiliarity with a long-term care residence can heighten anxiety and the feeling of being uprooted from home and having to part with possessions.

Depression
My father is of opinion that he is outlived. I feel that this expression is due to depression he suffers, which itself defines as; feelings of low self-worth, insomnia, low energy and poor concentration. Depression can develop due to number of reasons related to aged, such as when older persons lose daily contact with family members or become frustrated by a limited control over their health and environment.

Guilt
My father uses to address me frequently for his basic need, which prompted me to think that any elder would be handicapped and rely on someone else to fulfill their needs. For the aged category, the loss of being in the caregiver role to others may make them feel useless or worthless. As well role reversal is especially hard for those who have had lifelong caregiver roles. This is especially proven by my father, who had become the caretaker of our family of two before entering into long term care for over a decade.

Anger
The sense of being abandoned with accessibility to limited mobility results irritation and anger. Elderly may feel frustration at assistance necessitated when the elderly perceive that caregivers are treating them as either fragile or unstable individuals.

Happiness
I do not exclude the possibility of pleasure for the aged in long term care. It is to become a reality such services could be sensitive, attentive and proactive. Keeping the aged engaged in social activities minimizes the impact of being alone. Interaction in social groups; schools-mates, religious environments, the church, temple or mosque facilitates the old person connected to the community. Gardening as well as pets may infuse a sense of responsibility in order to curtail the mental and physical deterioration.

Above was a summary as to my knowledge, how I look at my father’s behavior. I believe that an expertise in this field could lead into multiples of my segregation of characteristics. I do not posses such knowledge to go for a deeper analysis so as to seek solution to fulfill the aspirations of the mentality of the aged. However I emphasize the need of a start for further development of the duty to the aged by the society.

(The writer contributed the article via social media. You can directly submit your articles via this page)

 

 

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